Welcome to the very first entry of the Full Circle Counseling Services blog; “ News to Nurture the Feminine Soul”. I have noticed many times that “very firsts” are difficult for so many of us. The very first time we ride a bike “all by ourselves” is both scary and exhilarating; our very first kiss, awkward and sweetly memorable, our very first “real” job anxiety producing and rewarding. But somewhere along the way, many of us forget the exhilaration, sweetness and rewards of life’s firsts and begin to worry almost exclusively about and even dwell on the anxiety, fears, and awkwardness. We stay in dead-end relationships because we worry about being alone, our financial future or how our decision may affect others. We stay on a career path that no longer fits, because, well, “it sort of works for now” and it’s familiar, easy and safe. We don’t step out to make new friends though we find ourselves in need, because we don’t know how to do it, where to go or if others will like and accept us. You get the picture…somewhere along the way, though chronologically we move forward, our personal growth stays stuck.
Bottom line is, change is difficult for everyone, but even more so when we are moving into the unknown. So often, we feel a desperate need to know the answers regarding our future; to have a crystal ball that will help us know which direction to move, exactly how to get there and where our final destination will be. These unanswerable questions leave us feeling paralyzed, stuck, frustrated and discontent.
My solution? “Ask the questions and then live into the answers.” We don’t have to know exactly who or what’s in store for us if we end an unhealthy relationship, we don’t need to know exactly where our career path will lead if we begin a job search, and we don’t need to map out all the precise strategies to make new friends; we need only move in the direction that intuitively feels like the next best step and let the rest unfold as it will.
Take a lesson from a toddler who is learning to walk…despite the number of times she loses her balance, falls, gets hurt and cries, she gets right back up…she moves fearlessly forward, with no map, no knowledge of what may trip her up on her path, and no specific destination she must reach. And yet with one small baby step after another, she soon finds her feet on solid ground, not only walking, but running toward life’s next exciting “very first”. I hope you too will run toward the next exciting “very first” waiting for you…
